sranks | we are the cursed we came from fire and ice

She does that as well? [Camilla's hand comes up in front of her, though it hides the slightly stern expression behind that hand.] Lord Lorenz is much the same. Truly, he's likely going to be worse about it now that I'm injured...but I am more than capable of doing what needs to be done, and more. Breaks are simply time that could be well spent on another task...

[oh my god you two???]

Oh, they are. I am certain of that. [Camilla shakes her head a bit.] And I am not surprised either. It is truly a shame that stubbornness is a common trait among them, in such a regard...

It's frustrating not to be able to serve to the best of my ability because she insists on doing so much herself. It's been that way since we were children, and nothing I say or do will ever change her mind. I've accepted this, but that doesn't make it any less irritating.

[It's perhaps the most candid he's ever been about his service to Lady Edelgard. He can't really say he minds it, as strange as it feels to be open about this.]

Of course, from the sound of it, you've experienced something very similar.

[oh my god finally, someone who understands...]

Indeed, I have. I realize this is because he is expected to succeed His Grace and lead House Gloucester, but it is frustrating. I've certainly tried to change his mind many a time as well, and yet, each and every time...

[Camilla sighs a bit, though she does smile a touch.]

...Still, I suppose it is a bit of a charming aspect of them. It certainly spells good things for the future, if they are both working so hard as it stands. [And Camilla does mean that. Though, she does look towards Hubert and lower her hand a bit, folding them in front of her.] I am quite glad to talk with someone who understands this situation most intimately. I'm certain none of the others would even come close to understanding what sort of frustration this would cause, and just how much our lieges matter to us.

[That's perhaps a presumptuous and almost arrogant suggestion, but it is pretty genuine. Camilla may like to lavish with praises and the like, but she always means what she says, and this is no different.]

It does. I have no doubt a bright future awaits them.

[...Well, one of them, at least. Lorenz's future depends on what House Gloucester decides to do. He's content to move on then, not exactly eager to continue talking about a future that Camilla can't begin to imagine right now.]

I have had the unfortunate experience of attempting to explain my loyalty and actions for Lady Edelgard to others; it never goes well. This is a position most people cannot seem to understand. Even others in a similar position do not always agree.

[Dedue's a good example. He's loyal, certainly, but he's more of a lapdog than anything else. He follows every order without complaint, but he never thinks outside those orders. Attempting to discuss such a thing with him would be a waste of time.

Camilla, on the other hand, does seem to understand. She seems like she would go just as far as he does for Lady Edelgard, though he can't say that for certain. He doubts she's ever been in a position where disobeying her lord's direct order would be more beneficial to him. Still, it's... nice to have someone who gets it, at least a bit.]

[Camilla nods her head in agreement. It's easy to agree, because they want similar things for their lieges. It's as simple as that, at least to Camilla. As far as she knows, the future will be bright.

Of course, Camilla listens as Hubert talks about explaining his loyalty, and that does get Camilla to shift a bit. It's not out of anything bad; if anything, it does make sense.]

...What a shame, really. Such dedication is what other servants should aspire towards.

[Camilla wonders, inwardly...would he be willing to kill for Edelgard? Surely, there was a reason one of House Vestra's men was sent to the Gloucester estate, if not to kill, than at least to spy for a potential future kill. The blood on Camilla's hands from that was justified, as far as she was concerned; she defended her lord and His Grace. It's a simple matter.

But that's probably not a subject to get into for the feast. Not really, at least, even if she probably should clarify that it's nothing personal...

...]

Not everyone understands that a servant must be willing to go above and beyond the call of duty, if they wish to keep their liege safe. Even if it's something that their liege won't think of doing.

[That's gentler, but it's perhaps surprisingly honest.]

Edited (...let's go with this wording instead) 2019-10-06 23:55 (UTC)

Some can only see what is directly in front of them. A direct threat to one's lord is easier to take on than potential threats hiding in the shadows.

[That's what the difference is, as far as he's concerned. Planning and preparing for the worst case scenario doesn't come naturally so some people. It might not have been second-nature for him if he wasn't trained into it.]

Being able to see what needs to be done for one's lord is not as simple as listening to their orders and following their instructions. An inexperienced retainer might not realize that.

[Camilla has been at this for quite some time as well, though he has no idea what her training was like. Regardless, she has the passion required to handle such matters well - or at least better than most retainers he's seen.]

It certainly is. There's no denying that. And a direct threat is far easier to...take care of, so to speak.

[Camilla's tone is gentle, and not betraying anything as she continues.]

A good retainer must be proactive at dealing with threats. Whether their lord realizes that such things are threats or not. Sometimes, perhaps...it's better to ask for forgiveness, than to ask for permission.

[...]

It is getting rather late, isn't it?

[Camilla's tone doesn't change at all, but that admission...well, it was perhaps a bit too honest. But she doesn't appear perturbed by what she's admitted, at any rate. What she's said was clearly intentional, rather than a slip, and she turns to smile at Hubert, kindly as ever with no hint of malice at all.]

[Hmm. Perhaps he's said too much. In a way, it almost feels like he hasn't said enough when she calls him on it, but he nods at her words anyway. There isn't anything in his words or expression to further damn him.]

It is. I need to return to Lady Edelgard's side.

[After a moment of consideration, he rests a hand on his chest and folds one behind his back before ducking into a bow.]

Thank you for the challenge today. I do hope to face you again soon.

[Camilla gives Hubert a curtsy in kind--it's a little wobbly, and Camilla curses herself inwardly for agitating her injuries, but she comes up pretty easily.]

Of course. I look forward to it as well. I have no intention of holding back when we spar, so do be sure to bring your very best.

[Camilla starts to walk at that, but she only gets a few steps before she pauses, turning to face him again.]

And... [...] For any past transgressions, against you and yours...I do apologize for them. I was only acting in the best interests of my lord. It was nothing personal at all.

I simply thought you should know that.

[Camilla will at least try to walk off at that--she's regretting not doing so earlier because she does feel a little out of sorts now, but she should be fine.]

[He watches her wobble through her curtsy, but makes no move to assist. If she falls, he'll help, but he doesn't think she will. She won't allow herself to.

He's content to let her go, so when she turns back and apologizes... Honestly, he's not sure what to make of it. He already knew it was nothing personal, but the fact that she's gone out of her way to apologize is... very strange. He isn't sure what to do with it.

Part of him wants to call her back, to confirm that it wasn't anything personal from House Vestra's side either. He doesn't; it isn't something she needs to know, and more importantly, it isn't information he should be giving so freely.

How strange, that a simple understanding could bring him so close to spilling even one unimportant secret.]

we are the cursed we came from fire and ice

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