sranks | ROLLING AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND

["Oh, Sonny, you're sweet. You didn't have to! But, well...I have a guest here to see you. You're gonna want to see him."

Sonic looks a little apprehensive for a moment, but he does wait for Dorothea to let in her little guest. He's not sure what to expect, really, but...

When Neo enters, Sonic almost drops the little tea kettle that he's borrowed from Dorothea; it's something she definitely brought with her, but when he sees Neo properly, he's stunned. He didn't think Neo could come back from that, he...]

N...Neo? Neo, is that really you...?!

[Sonic practically darts at Neo and pulls him into a tight hug--mostly to see if this is...if he's real, if any of this is real. It's a shock to the system for him, to say the least, but...

Oh, Sonic's so relieved.]

[There's no sense in being apprehensive about this. He already knows it's going to be difficult - primarily for Sonic - but it'll be worth it. After all, he's suffered far too much and now Neo's back. It won't make everything right immediately, but it should help. Still, he finds himself hesitating a bit as Dorothea gets the door and introduces him...

Until he's being hugged by his boyfriend, and Neo's arms are around Sonic's back in an instant. His grip is tight - not painfully so, of course, he's mindful of his strength as always - and he nuzzles against the top of Sonic's head instinctively as he's done so many times in the past.]

I'm sorry for leaving you, but yes, I'm here. I'm not going anywhere again. You have my word.

[The words are soft, but there's a force behind them; an emotion that he can't quite get across in any other way. Neo doesn't have the words he needs for a proper apology for all of this, but for now... For now, this is good enough. Sonic needs to know he's physically here, that this isn't a dream or cruel prank. He's here, and he isn't letting go anytime soon.]

[It's real. This is real, this is happening, Neo's...Neo's alive. Neo's alive, in his arms again, just when Sonic thought that it was over, that he'd screwed up royally, that Neo was never coming back...he kept his promise. He kept it, he found some way to keep it, and--]

...I'm sorry, Neo. I'm-- [Sonic sounds completely choked up, honestly. He's trying so hard not to cry, but he's so relieved and holding Neo so tight it's like he fears he'll disappear.] T-Thanks. For...keeping your promise. I...I don't know how you did it, but I'm so glad you're back--

[Dorothea's quick to get around them and grab her own cup of tea; she gives Neo a small wink before she lets them have their privacy. She can come back for her kettle and a few other things of hers in a while, after all. But for now...

For now, Sonic lets himself tear up and start to cry proper. He hates this, but he can't hold it back.]

I'm sorry--I'm sorry I got you killed...!!

[Neo's optics find Dorothea and he offers her a nod of wordless thanks as she takes her leave; he'll be sure to help her gather her things soon. But for now...]

Sonic.

[Just his name, coupled with a gentle scritch behind the ear.]

None of this was your fault. Do you understand me? You didn't do anything wrong. I acted as I did because I couldn't bear to see you get hurt. [Not again.] But I didn't think; it didn't occur to me how badly it would upset you. The situation was... less than ideal, but it isn't your fault. Please don't blame yourself.

[He can explain what happened after Sonic's calmed down a little, but this is the most pressing thing to address first. This isn't Sonic's fault. He needs to believe that.]

[The utterance of his name gets Sonic to pause in his apologies--he wants to apologize for the stupid plan, for getting him hurt, for failing him, but that gentle scritching gets him to stop for a moment and just. Try to calm himself down, listening to Neo's words as he holds him tight. He never wants to let go again.]

...I don't blame you either, Neo. I just...if I'd known that the monster was so strong--if I hadn't been overconfident, we wouldn't have gotten into that mess, and...

[Sonic stops himself. Neo's already asked him to stop blaming himself; the least Sonic can do is try to do that.]

But you've...you've got nothing to be sorry for either.

I'm here now, and I'm not going anywhere. Even if we struggle to accept what happened and our parts in it, that much is true.

[Some part of him will always blame himself for that. He imagines Sonic feels the same way. It isn't something they can simply move on from so easily, but they can't let themselves be consumed by the guilt either.]

So... let's try not to blame ourselves.

...I can try to do that, yeah. I...

[Neo's right. He's always had a way of calming Sonic down in the times where he overthinks, and for as much as Sonic's cared for Neo, Neo has always returned it tenfold. Sonic finds himself finally able to kiss one of Neo's cheeks as he wills himself to calm down a bit, still holding on tightly.]

...I'm so glad you're back. I thought you were a goner for sure.

[Neo nuzzles into it, machinery whirring softly in something that nearly mimics Sonic's purr.]

This world's magic is capable of bringing the dead back. I don't understand the specifics, but I did speak with someone who experienced it first-hand not long after I arrived.

[His gaze darts, but Neo forces himself to continue.]

My apologies for not bringing it up before now. It hadn't occurred to me that you might not know.

[Given what he was like when he first arrived here, Sonic can probably put the pieces together for why Neo was so insistent on learning about death in this world, but he doesn't want to think about that right now, so he won't bring it up!!]

[Honestly, that scans when Sonic thinks about it. It took them quite a while to actually talk like human beings, and Sonic had just gotten done with his own near death disaster at any opportunity it would've come up. Sonic chuckles a bit; it's still soft, still trying to recover from that week long depression, but it's there.]

Hey, it's alright. I mean...we had no reason to bring it up once we actually got talking with each other, y'know? It wasn't like we were in a situation that'd force us to think about it.

I'm just glad it actually worked. Magic's really weird and finicky, and I still don't get it, but...you're back. You're back, and that's what matters right now.

[Sonic starts to nuzzle Neo properly once all is said and done, though; not abating one inch in his hugging, though. It's as if he's still fearful, though he does his best to keep it off his face. It's all too apparent in how he clings to Neo, though. But Sonic listens while he does that, and...]

...I don't think I've ever heard you do that before. [Sonic pauses for a moment, looking into Neo's optics. He's not sure if this is what this is, but...] You're--you're alright right now, right? Are you...happy...?

Yes, that's true.

[Neo's not sure he could pinpoint the exact moment where he decided that killing Sonic was no longer his top priority. He's not sure when it fell off the list of priorities entirely either. Or when he decided that protecting Sonic was something he wanted to do instead of killing him. The transition has felt natural, something he's never truly sat and questioned, and he's not about to start now. After all, he likes this.

That much should already be obvious, even without the mechanical purr, but...]

Of course I am. I'm back where I need to be - want to be. I don't want to leave your side again. You mean everything to me, Sonic.

[And knowing how much he means to Sonic in turn is... overwhelming. Though the circumstances are far from ideal, how could he be anything but happy seeing how much his beloved rival cares for him?]

You mean everything to me too, Neo. Always have, and always will. But...

[Sonic's expression seems to brighten a bit, eyes slightly wide but full of light and vigor that he hasn't had since Neo died, and he finds himself kissing Neo's cheek again with a grin on his face.]

Neo, you're...you're purring! That's so cool! I didn't know you could do that!

[Sonic sounds absolutely delighted, like he's several years younger with way too much joy in his little body to contain. Sonic laughs, and it isn't subdued--it's bright, it's lively, and--]

I love you so much, Neo. I'm...I'm glad you're back home. I'm glad you're by my side again, and that I can hear something that cute from ya...!

[Ah... There was never any doubt in his mind, but at this moment, seeing Sonic so vibrant and happy makes it crystal clear: he truly loves his organic counterpart. That fight, no matter the consequences, was worth it, just to see Sonic smile and laugh so freely again. Neo will gladly accept the limitations of his own body if it means that his boyfriend can express himself to easily and fully like this, and being able to make him smile so is Neo's greatest accomplishment.]

I wasn't aware I could do it either.

[It's not as though he even really understood it until he was in Sonic's body experiencing it, and apparently his own body can react in kind now that he does get it. He's happy, and he wants to express that, and it manifests in a mirror of Sonic's own happiness. Fitting.]

I'm glad you like it, because you're undoubtedly going to be hearing it quite a bit.

[Sonic makes him incredibly, unbelievably happy, after all.]

As if I'd not wanna hear you get to be happy? Neo, this is...!

[Sonic hasn't quite eased this entire conversation, still wondering when the dream's going to be over and fade and leave him lonely and asking if he can hug Dorothea and cry but--no. This is real. This is real, and Sonic couldn't be happier.]

...Neo, I'm so proud of you. I know you ain't had an easy time learning to be yourself, but look at you--you're expressing yourself even more. You've always been trying, but I'm just...

It makes me really happy to see that you're able to seize it for yourself, and let yourself do it. I...gosh, I love you, Neo. If I can make you happy enough to do that, then that makes me real happy too.

[Sonic's laughter continues, bright as ever, and he just kind of finally eases into his boyfriend at long last. He finally feels at ease, at peace in a way he didn't think he'd get the chance to.]

I've missed you so much, Neo. It's...it's been rough without you here, but I'm...I'll get this place back to normal, promise. You should get some rest after all of that, yeah?

[There's...admittedly a lot Sonic's leaving unsaid, unsure if he should even talk about it at all. He still needs to get those blankets back on the couch, after all. And...get Dorothea's stuff back to her. And drink his tea that's likely gone cold now...]

[He scritches Sonic's ear again as if to confirm that yes, of course he's happy. He's pleased that this is something Sonic's so excited about - and maybe it is a good sign, that there's more he can do with this body than he realized. Something to consider later, anyway.]

My body is operating at peak efficiency, as though no damage was ever done to it. You don't need to worry about that.

[He flicks Sonic's ear at that. Come on now, you're the one who should be resting!!]

Please, leave the clean up to me. I kept you waiting for too long, so it's the least I can do.

[...]

Though you're welcome to stay right here with me, for as long as you'd like. There's no rush, after all.

[He can't imagine Sonic would want to let him go any time soon after what happened...]

[Sonic whines a bit when his ear gets flicked, pouting just a bit at that. His gaze averts shortly after, though; it's not like he knows what dying and coming back is like. The only time he came close to it was...]

...All I've been doing since you've been gone is sleeping, the least I can do is...

[It's a weak protest and one Sonic kills off quickly. He's still holding Neo so close, and he knows reasonably he should be fine. He should be fine with this, he's bouncing back so easily now that Neo's here. It's fine, right?

(He's still afraid he's going to wake up from this dream.)

Sonic's ears droop down a bit when he speaks up.]

...Please stay. I don't think I c--I don't want to be apart from you, for a while.

Of course I will.

[His hand moves to pet Sonic's ear before sliding back through his quills easily, hopefully reassuring.]

I'll stay right here, for as long as you want me to. I'm not going to leave you again.

[It's understandable that Sonic's worried - after all, he's spent a week thinking Neo was gone for good. It's not going to be easy to adapt even though Neo's back.]

[It is reassuring; it gets a slow, softer bit of purring from Sonic as he finally lets himself settle against Neo, breathing and doing his best to try and center himself. It's funny; he's never needed something like this before, but it's a reminder. A reminder that he's alive, that this is all real. That this is all real, and that Neo's back in his arms again.

Sonic shakes a bit, letting the words settle in the air for a while. He doesn't know if he wants to talk about this, or if Neo even wants to hear it. Neo just got done dying; does he really need to burden his boyfriend with his emotional state, too?

Sonic's gaze averts, but he curls into Neo, almost into a ball, honestly.]

...Thank you, Neo. I...I know I could've probably been fine in a while, but it wasn't...I...

[...]

I didn't know what to do. I'm used to going where ever the wind takes me but...being directionless like that, it was...bad. I'm glad you're back.

[Neo holds Sonic close, claws stilling against his boyfriend's quills as he realizes that standing here is likely sort of uncomfortable... Come here, you. Neo simply lifts his boyfriend up and carries him over to the couch before settling back down; now you can cuddle as much as you want!!]

You experienced a truly traumatic event. Anyone would have a difficult time processing and coming to terms with that, let alone finding a way to move forward. A week is hardly enough time for any of that.

[Granted, he's never experienced such a thing for himself and can only guess, but... well, he remembers how it felt when Sonic was injured. Back then he didn't understand... any of that, but now? He can absolutely get why Sonic was so broken up about it.]

You don't need to pretend around me, you know. You were hurt and there's nothing wrong with feeling that. I'm back now, but that doesn't invalidate your feelings any.

[He doesn't mind listening. He wants to do what he can to help his boyfriend, after all.]

[That--actually gets a surprised noise out of him and his heart hammers for a brief moment, because sometimes he forgets that his boyfriend is actually strong enough to lift him easily? It's. It's very attractive.

Sonic absolutely curls up with his boyfriend on the couch while he flushes up a storm, and it's almost enough to distract him from the fact that his boyfriend does want him to talk to him. It's...well, it's difficult. It shouldn't matter, because Neo's right here. He's right here, and...]

...It still feels like I'm gonna wake up near your charging port alone again, I'm not gonna lie. It...still doesn't feel real. I'm sure I'll get used to it, but...

I missed you. I didn't realize I could miss someone this much. I'm used to people leaving my life and sometimes...sometimes they don't come back. I've always been used to it, but it was different this time.

[A lot of his thoughts were static, or unpleasant. Directionless, vague, pervasive noise that blocked out the world and sapped his near limitless energy.]

...It felt...empty. I think that's what it is. Emptiness that's slowly getting filled back up.

[...]

Don't...I know I can't ask you to stop protecting me. Just like...you can't ask me to stop protecting you. But...I...

[He doesn't know how to word this. Does he want to ask Neo to please stop considering himself so expendable? Does he want to ask Neo to make sure they go together, if they have to go at all? Does he want to make sure they never run into an incident like this again? Realistically, there's no way to prepare for something like that properly if they continue to fight. There's no way to ask either of them to stop either; it's what they do. It's what they love to do.]

...I don't...know. What I want to ask, or how to ask it, but...

...Please don't leave me alone again.

[He listens as his boyfriend slowly opens up. Sonic isn't usually the sort to hesitate or stumble over his words, which is only a testament to how difficult this whole situation has been on him. Of course Neo feels bad about it - how could he not? He's unintentionally caused his boyfriend so much suffering, and he can't fully say he's sorry about it, because he'd do it again in a heartbeat if it meant keeping Sonic safe.

Which is the problem, really. They're both fighters and refusing to fight simply isn't in their nature. They've both come to have one another's backs, but that also means that they're willing to put their lives on the line for one another. In some ways, maybe this was always going to happen to one of them, whether it was Neo or Sonic. It's the natural trajectory of their relationship, where one of them would inevitably end up taking an attack for the other they just couldn't recover from.]

I understand. I can imagine how... how devastated I'd be were I in your position, particularly because there isn't anything that can truly prevent something like this from happening again.

[They will continue to fight. They will continue to look out for one another. They may very well end up taking a fatal hit for one another again.]

In this body, it is unlikely I would suffer destruction devastating enough that I would truly be gone again. In fact, once we get up, allow me to leave detailed instructions on what to do should my body become nonfunctional. I am made up of two core components that could be placed into a temporary body; as long as those components are not destroyed, I will still exist.

[This is the technical aspect that gives him comfort, but more than that, it's something they can physically do. He can explain how it works and what Sonic can do to help, should it happen, so that may provide some measure of comfort.]

But even so, I understand your concerns. I do not want to leave you alone again, and I will do my best to ensure it never happens. I cannot guarantee it, but at the very least it will be very difficult for it to happen. I'll fight as hard as I can to ensure I won't leave your side.

Yeah. I wouldn't ever want you to hurt like that.

[It's something of an apology on Sonic's part, too--he's never really gotten a chance to ever apologize for the first time Sonic tried to take a hit for Neo. Sure, he was overconfident enough to think that yeah, he won't die from this, but...

Sonic finds it in himself to smile, just a bit. Neo's always practical, but it's something Sonic appreciates; tangible actions, tangible ways to do something to help Neo. Sonic's been getting better with his handiness by the day, and Sonic can do just about anything if given proper instructions from Neo now. If that's truly a way to save him...]

...I'll do my best, too. To...to try and make sure that doesn't happen--so we don't get stuck in a position that it does. A lot of our friends were pretty devastated too. None of 'em gave me an earful or anything, but they definitely were concerned.

But I'll fight hard, too. I don't want to leave yours, either...if you're willing to give it your all, then I am, too. I know we can't guarantee it, but we're precious. To each other, and others, too.

[He doesn't want to say if we go, we go together, because neither of them should. He could see it in the way they all looked at him, sadness, anger that they held back, and some of them wanting to make sure he was okay. Some of them will likely come and make sure Neo is, too, he's sure.]

...Please, teach me about it. There's still a lot I don't know about you, but if I can make sure you don't die, I'll commit it to memory!

[He nuzzles against Sonic and those claws resume gently gliding through his boyfriend's quills.]

I will ensure to let them know I'm fine now. I'm... glad that they were there for you.

[It's strange to think that they were upset about him - but then, why wouldn't they be? He may not be as friendly and outgoing as his organic counterpart, but Neo's reached out to others and made connections, so of course they'd feel his loss. It would be the same were any of them to die.

Regardless, Neo nods at the next part. Yes, they're absolutely precious to one another, and they should never have to go through something like this again. He'll do what he can to make sure of it, and he knows Sonic feels the same way.]

My being is composed of two parts: my programming, the part that makes me who I am, as well as my memories. These are stored separately within my body. You've already seen the former; it's kept within the panel on my back. The latter is kept within my head. Both of these are required to recreate me as I am now, although if only one can be saved, my memories are more important.

[One could argue that Neo is tied down by his programming and that most of it has just caused more issues than it solves, but it is a part of who he is.]

[Sonic listens to that, purring becoming a little louder in the face of Neo's attention to his quills. He already knows a fair bit about the panel in the back at least, so it at least makes sense to him already given that he's done basic repairs.]

Makes perfect sense to me. I guess in a way, it's like...it's like your head and your heart? [Sonic places a hand on Neo's chest, as if to emphasize it.] Like, that's what it'd be on us. So as long as that can be preserved, you can come back in some way...

[Sonic considers that for a moment. He doesn't know which to think of as which, but it does make sense to him that Neo's memories would be important. After all, memories make a person just as much as their living, breathing body. But Neo's programming...Neo's programming is just as much who he is as his memories.

...Sonic hopes it never comes down to having to choose, because he does worry it wouldn't be the same, complete Neo that he knows without it. Even if he wonders if freeing him from that would be better.

Sonic discards that.]

...I promise I'll keep you safe and learn everything I can. I'll rebuild you from scratch if I gotta. Just means I'm gonna need to really hunker down and start learning more, huh? [Sonic grins just the slightest bit at that.] I don't want you to be anything but yourself, after all.

[His head and his heart. He hadn't thought of it like that, but that's an apt comparison. Neo continues to gently run his claws through Sonic's quills, nuzzling against his boyfriend at that.]

Thank you. I promise I'll be careful so you shouldn't ever have to do something like that - but now you know what to do should anything ever happen to me again.

[It's a concrete goal that Sonic can work towards, and that seems to have calmed him down. Neo's pleased to see it, of course.]

Thanks, Neo. I'll try to do the same, so you don't ever have to worry either.

[Sonic infinitely prefers concrete goals rather than what-ifs. If he can get himself knowledgeable enough, Neo will never have to worry about dying again. It's something Sonic can do, if he puts his mind to it, and...

It's something he can reach towards, to live a good life with his beloved. That alone is enough.

...Of course, once the silence hits and Sonic's contently looking around the house a bit, he notices the. Long abandoned cup of tea on the counter and sighs at himself a bit. That's probably undrinkable now...]

...Hey, Neo. You mind too terribly if I keep you to myself for the day? [Sonic's awake, at least, but look at all of this moving he's willing to do now that he has his boyfriend back. None. None of it.] I'm not tired, but...I dunno. I don't wanna be apart from you.

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metaloverlord - 2025-01-09 20:01 (UTC) - Expand

ROLLING AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND

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